Not all love endeavors require a profound, soulful connection. Don’t assume that the relationship is over if you see these telltale signs that indicate your mate is unlovable.
Throughout life, we will come into contact with a wide variety of people, and each of them will teach us valuable lessons about ourselves and our goals. It doesn’t mean that this relationship wasn’t valuable even if it wasn’t meant to last.
It is crucial to examine your reasons for remaining in the relationship if you have a deep-seated sense that the person you are dating is not someone you will ever truly fall in love with. Do you fear what it would be like to be “alone” or single?
Are you severing yourself from a relationship that you might truly want because you don’t value who you are and what you have to offer?
If you said “yes” to any of these questions, consider what this individual is providing for you that you wouldn’t be prepared to give up on yourself. You may discover that all you needed was already within of you.
1. You aren’t speaking the same language
Communication is the cornerstone of any serious relationship. If the two of you aren’t on the same page about what you want moving forward — or if you haven’t even broached it at all — than both of you might have some avoidance about addressing where you are actually going.
Or, both of you might be doing a lot of talking that doesn’t actually get to what you both want. You might struggle to feel heard in the relationship, or you might be unable to hear your partner out when they want to talk about “where this is headed.” Serious conversations shouldn’t daunt you in a deeply loving relationship.
“The most important part of a relationship is communication,” said Three Day Rule’s date coach and matchmaker, Nora Dekeyser, to Elite Daily. “If you do not have this, you are not respecting each other and clearly don’t feel for the other as you do for yourself.”
2. You fantasize about breaking up with them
Every relationship has some ups and downs now and again, but if every down makes you fantasize about ending things once and for all, then that’s a major sign that you aren’t fully invested in the relationship. You’re imagining a way out for yourself because, subconsciously, you know that things would be better off for both of you if you called it quits.
According to relationship expert and bestselling author Susan Winter, frequently imagining leaving your partner is an indication that there is a “palpable emptiness in the relationship.”
There’s no reason to hang on to a relationship that isn’t feeding and nurturing you in the way that you need, either for you or for your partner. Both of you deserve to find people who can support you in the ways you want to be supported. Don’t put off finding what you really want in favour of complacency or comfort. Bitterness will soon follow.
3. You feel alone in The relationship
I’m often baffled by stories of couples who are treating each other worse than their friends would treat them — and tolerating it. What is a relationship if not a deep, loving friendship between two souls?
“Love eventually turns into a true partnership between best friends that are also attracted to each other,” Dekeyser explained to Elite Daily. If your love has not transformed into such a stable relationship, then it might not have had a stable source from the start.
You don’t owe it to anyone to stay in a relationship where you aren’t happy — least of all to yourself. If these red flags ring true for your relationship, really take some time to ask yourself what you’re getting out of this partnership and whether it’s worth staying in it any longer or if there’s truly hope that things will work out.